Monday, September 13, 2010 a very strong emotion....I am feeling it from the tip of my toes to the smallest micro-vessels in my brain....When I am feeling hate there is nothing that will fix it for now.  I will feel it and it will hurt and I will cry, and cry and cry....
This particular hate has come as at such a inopportune time.  A time when I was going to spend seeking greater inner peace for me.  My goal to leave all the shit, the turmoil behind me, is always halted by this one miserable f***ing hate. Peace eludes me yet again...I see the easier it get the more elusive it is.  This is on me, it must be.
I get nothing about this hatefulness, the need to control, to say YOU WILL do it my way.  Well Hate you can have it all, you already took the best parts of me anyway...
I have worked it every way I can and still I Hate...why?  You can ask, well just love, but when it's dead, love that is, how does it resurrect?  I doesn't  it's gone, and I am left with Hate, and sorrow, fear, anger, frustration.

I know love, I know love very well.  I experience it every day.  This love has also known hate, but is risking to love me, and am risking to love him.  If just a portion of the love I know could go to that one could work, but really will it, or will it suck up all the joy and the caring, and knowing, and turn into more Hate.
I know the loves that I bore into the world.  I love them with all I am.  My love will not heal them, they must love themselves to heal....but I'm here to BE my word and stand for them and love them along their journey..

I AM a powerful, beautiful, peaceful, open woman of light....

I AM am the living Light, Light, Light,
I AM the presence of God I AM
I AM the open door which NO man can shut
I AM here, I AM there, I AM the only presence everywhere!!

I AM Love
I AM Peace
I AM Beautiful
I AM that I AM.........

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